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Contraints on Communication Construct More Interesting Truths

Contraints on Communication Construct More Interesting Truths

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I would like to see someone do some contemporary intellectual work on how indirect communication – communication by signals and pointers and gestures rather than direct statement – produces the best art.

The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple. ~ Oscar Wilde

Communication whose style and content is dictated by constraints imposed by the rules of a scene is more creative, even more joyful, even if the realities of the life that produces the thought is very difficult.

Jean Baudrillard did some of this work in bemoaning the loss of the scene itself, which is the stage for the distinction between good and evil that we all navigate. Without the binary antipodes of cultural constraint, do we really find motivation to do anything of importance?

A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it. ~ Oscar Wilde

Art communicates what cannot be expressed by other means. There is more truth in fiction and in art than in any amount of moralizing speech.

When homosexuality could not be spoken, thinkers and artists – and even politicians – discovered ways to indicate what was already known, and to do it without speaking it. We love to bust these out into the open, but the art was all about indications and play.

It made great art. Plays, paintings, poetry, speeches, philosophies…

Oppressed people can create the most amazing stuff – amazing music, amazing fiction. Think of Russian novelists. Think of black gospel music compared to the dirge-like church music of privileged white colonizers. It’s true that abject poverty can also denigrate people below any ability to create, too, but among them… always a genius, a prophet.

Sometimes I wonder if that’s not at least part of what is meant by not being “of this world.” The rewards of this world – money, power, and so on – are rewards in themselves. They are rewards for now, to be enjoyed now. But that’s all.

The rewards of those who are censored and constrained and even oppressed are, by their very structure and nature, more complex – more insightful – more subtle – more deeply real. When you care enough to work around tough rules of expression, you find a way – like life itself always finds a way.

It will be a marvelous thing – the true personality of man – when we see it. It will grow naturally and simply, flower-like, or as a tree grows. It will not be at discord. It will never argue or dispute. It will not prove things. It will know everything. And yet it will not busy itself about knowledge. It will have wisdom. Its value will not be measured by material things. It will have nothing. And yet it will have everything, and whatever one takes from it, it will still have, so rich will it be. It will not be always meddling with others, or asking them to be like itself. It will love them because they will be different. And yet, while it will not meddle with others, it will help all, as a beautiful thing helps us by being what it is. The personality of man will be very wonderful. It will be as wonderful as the personality of a child. In its development it will be assisted by Christianity, if men desire that; but if men do not desire that, it will develop none the less surely. For it will not worry itself about the past, nor care whether things happened or did not happen. Nor will it admit any laws but its own laws; nor any authority but its own authority. Yet it will love those who sought to intensify it, and speak often of them. And of these Christ was one. “Know Thyself” was written over the portal of the antique world. Over the portal of the new world, “Be Thyself” shall be written. And the message of Christ to man was simply “Be Thyself.” That is the secret of Christ. ~ Oscar Wilde

The traditions of men serve to stabilize communities, but they also create boundaries that are made to be flirted with – deconstructed. As you toe the line, you doodle all around that line. Without a line, you can’t… doodle.

It’s not brazen. It’s not open. It’s not honest. And yet – isn’t it more truthful to experience? Doesn’t it really address you all the more forcefully?

It does me.

Tell all the Truth but tell it slant—
Success in Circuit lies
Too bright for our infirm Delight
The Truth’s superb surprise
As Lightening to the Children eased
With explanation kind
The Truth must dazzle gradually
Or every man be blind— ~ Emily Dickinson

“…music is the perfect type of art. Music can never reveal its ultimate secret. This, also, is the explanation of the value of limitations in art. The sculptor gladly surrenders imitative colour, and the painter the actual dimensions of form, because by such renunciations they are able to avoid too definite a presentation of the Real, which would be mere imitation, and too definite a realisation of the Ideal, which would be too purely intellectual. It is through its very incompleteness that art becomes complete in beauty, and so addresses itself, not to the faculty of recognition nor to the faculty of reason, but to the aesthetic sense alone, which, while accepting both reason and recognition as stages of apprehension, subordinates them both to a pure synthetic impression of the work of art as a whole, and, taking whatever alien emotional elements the work may possess, uses their very complexity as a means by which a richer unity may be added to the ultimate impression itself.” ~ Oscar Wilde

Benefits of Being a Former Jehovah’s Witness

Benefits of Being a Former Jehovah’s Witness

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I was visited again this morning by a lovely Jehovah’s Witness. He seemed to be a very sweet person. I’m laughing like God(ess) was tickling me. In honor of that, this is a post about the benefits of no longer being a Jehovah’s Witness (beyond not having to go door-to-door on a blustery day like today).

I’d like to set the stage with a satirical treatment of the benefits of being a JW. An illuminating example is this post by the Theocratic Joker:

  1. Jehovah’s Witnesses can count the time they share their faith with nonbelievers door-to-door or with young children, thus proving to God, in actual hard numbers, how worthy they are to have everlasting life.
  2. Jehovah’s Witnesses are encouraged not to attend college, which promotes independent thinking and is controlled by demons. They are happy to get a good job as a janitor or a window washer.
  3. Jehovah’s Witnesses get to celebrate the birth of a child but not the anniversary of the birth. They also do not have to worry about birthdays, holidays and Christmas, all of which are pagan and controlled by demons.
  4. Jehovah’s Witnesses do not pass a collection plate at their meetings like the demonized churches do. Instead there are collections boxes in their Kingdom Halls and Assembly Halls, and they are often reminded from the platform and in their literature not to forget to contribute. They are also urged to put in their wills that when they die, their house, CD’s, jewelery, life insurance, and cash go directly to the Watchtower Society. The end is fast approaching so their families really have no need for money that should rightfully go to them.
  5. Jehovah’s Witnesses do not celebrate holidays so they do not have to be with their families during these special times to enjoy each other’s company and eat the cookies, turkey, ham, pies, and other such food.
  6. Because Jehovah’s Witnesses are the only true Christians on earth, we do not have the problems that other churches have with broken families, adultery, fornication, pedophiles, over drinking, and gossip.
  7. Jehovah’s Witnesses do not have to worry about giving food, shelter and clothing to the poor and needy in our community because we give them the Truth which will enable them to live forever in a paradise earth.
  8. Jehovah’s Witnesses are in close contact with God as he speaks to them through the Faithful and Discreet Slave and through the Watchtower.
  9. Jehovah’s Witnesses alone will live in Paradise where there will be no cars, TVs, computers, radios, theaters, washing machines, clothes dryers, refrigerators, stoves, airplanes, electric lights, or malls to buy or clothes. Just miles and miles of garden and lions to pet.
  10. Jehovah’s Witnesses go to a summer District Assembly vacation every year, at the same city every year and have a picnic at their seats during the sessions and then stay at the fine hotels that they are told to stay in.
  11. Jehovah’s Witnesses know the true meaning of the words soon, near, very soon, very near, so close, just around the corner, shortly, near future and rapidly approaching.
  12. Jehovah’s Witnesses do not have to worry about getting old or having a retirement plan. See No. 11 above.

Hopefully, now you can understand the many benefits of being a Jehovah’s Witness.

Now, for the benefits of no longer being a Jehovah’s Witness, I would love it if former JWs would post on that topic and link it in the comments. My dear friend Richard Francis started this ball rolling, and I think it’s a good idea to revisit this from time to time – so as to keep remembering what has been gained, and to feel the sense of gratitude that such remembering can give.

The first link is Richard’s list. Reading it made me very happy. The second link includes a few of the lists made by others responding in kind. In the third link, the benefits of leaving are implicit rather than listed, but you can see some heartening trends across all of these.

When I think of the benefits of being freed from “the organization,” it’s pretty overwhelming. Much of it is very difficult to describe to someone who has not been through that kind of experience. However, there are a few major categories into which the benefits tend to fall for me. I’m probably missing some, but here is the best I can do today:

  • Freedom: As many of the posts suggest, this is the overarching category. All of the others assume this one, which has two movements – 1) Liberating freedom from the anti-loving beliefs and practices dictated by the Watchtower leadership – from totalitarian control and fear and arbitrary divisions of thinking and bad argument and small-minded judgments to the corrupting complicity with all of the above – and more. 2) Authentic freedom to grow and thrive and be a real adult in all ways: spiritual, intellectual, emotional, existential. That would encompass such things as thinking things through for one’s self, learning to discern who to respect and admire, being politically concerned and active, giving to charities of one’s choosing, fruitful experimentation with diverse spiritual ideas and practices, sharing authentic friendships with anyone of your choosing, paying attention to (and trusting) one’s own gifts and calling, and much, much, much, MUCH more.
  • Love – as in a Deeper Capacity for, and Ability to: When you view other people only in terms of their possibly contaminating effect on you or their potential as a new convert or as points on your service report, when you view them as about to be murdered by God and as inferior to yourself, and when you are threatened by and suspicious of their ideas and feelings, it is pretty difficult to care and to be kind and to trust and to enter into dialogue and relationship with them. If agape love is reserved for the members of a small in-group, your capacity to love others is very restricted. And if there is no kindness even there, it’s a very stark and cold kind of existence. The love I used to know was always, always conditional – but the spirit is all about love, and the more there is love, the more love there can be. “There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear because fear has to do with punishment, and so one who fears is not yet perfect in love” (1 John 4:18). No-one is perfect in love because no-one is perfect, but when you can love others without restriction and prejudice, your capacity for love… increaseth (grin). Another benefit of this is that when you learn to love, you also learn that there is much that is lovable about yourself – and this helps to undo the habitual self-loathing that seemed to go along with the self-righteousness training.
  • Spirituality: My spiritual life is much more authentic, more real, more attuned, more… spiritual. I could expand on this, but I’d rather take on that subject matter in terms of specific topics. Suffice to say that there are substantial qualitative differences in the questions I ask, the kinds of answers I consider, and a different perspective even on such things as the role of “I” on the path to God. My thoughts about who and what God might be are radically changed, and that has made a huge difference. I’ve also benefited from a range of spiritual practices that had been denied to me.
  • Ethics: Yes, it’s related. There is a kind of immature ethics that can only define right and wrong in terms of what authority figures dictate or in terms of what results in rewards and punishments. Such an ethics keeps you in an infantile sort of relationship with others. A rule-based ethics can never account for the actual realities of people’s lives. Another kind of ethics is based on kinship networks and group loyalties, but is limited to those groups. As a post-JW, it becomes possible to develop meta-principles and relational thinking that try to take everyone’s interest into account, not just those of a few. When you do not fear to hear a wide range of thoughts and testimonies, you can ethically evolve beyond a reliance on projection, scapegoating and appeals to authority. It also allows you – if you choose – to consider the cultural and socio-political contexts of ethical claims.
  • Laughter, Joy, Celebration: Enjoyment of all kinds, with only the restrictions of my own sense of ethics. I can laugh, be happy, and celebrate whatever I want to – large or small, in a manner conventional or eclectic. I love this.
  • Creativity: I no longer have to feel that weird semi-ashamed veil that was thrown over everything to do with imagination and creativity. I can write, and dance, and sing, and paint, and imagine, and have reveries and insights and all the rest. I can be curious, and investigate, and think, and see new connections between unlike things, finding and constructing new meanings – those mysterious shimmery bits of radiance that I value so highly.
  • Communities: Plural. It is an amazing thing to be able to participate at will in communities -groups of people that share something in common – anything! What an idea! Reading groups, political action groups, online groups, groups based on ideas or hobbies or anything! Wow! You can meet and form relationships with all kinds of interesting people you’d never have met otherwise. This one is a very special benefit, partially because when I realized that I could actually do this, it helped to counteract what was an initial skepticism toward all communities (once burned, twice shy). More than that, the sometimes-overlapping circles of my friends now mean so much to me that I can really compare it against how it once was and see what a difference my friends have made. I am thankful for true friends and for the occasional gift of a real spiritual brother or sister (in a sense that makes a caricature of the words as I used to use them).

Obviously, this post is written for former JWs (and the people who love them). I don’t really think there are a great many benefits associated with being a Jehovah’s Witness. If you are a current JW then you are also welcome to post real benefits that you feel as well, if you wish to do so, and link those in the comments. I have nothing against you, but only against the cruelties of the leadership. There are so many paths to God, and maybe – somehow – this is yours. God has a way of using everything, and I have no doubts about how the cosmos handles complexity.

One of the huge benefits of not being a JW is that I am no longer required to hate spiritual paths that are not identical to the one to which I am called. Nor do I have to fear you – or judge you to be worldly and/or evil – simply for the reason that you are not part of an organization to which I belong. That’s a really, really big benefit from my perspective – but of course there are many, many, many people from many religious traditions who do not agree (may they be blessed).

Human Body Hacks

Human Body Hacks

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Tips and tricks for those moments when your body is bugging you.

  • Sinus Congestion? – Relieve sinus pressure by alternately thrusting your tongue against the roof of your mouth, then pressing between your eyebrows with one finger. You may look like Felix Unger, but the motion loosens congestion by making the vomer bone rock back and forth. This bone runs from the nasal passages to the mouth. After about 20 seconds, you’ll feel your sinuses start to drain. (Here’s another one that works for me: Get some Swiss Kriss, a laxative tea. Don’t drink it, but boil some in a pot of water. Being careful not to burn yourself, breathe in the scented steam. Side benefit: it empties your pores too – a great, cheap facial.)
  • Toothache? – If you can’t get in to see the dentist right away, rub ice on the V-shaped webbed area between your thumb and index finger on the back of your hand. The nerve pathways at the base of that V stimulate an area of the brain that blocks pain signals from the face and hands. If you don’t have ice, you can rub that area too – if it hurts just a little, you’re doing it right. Adding ice to the mix reduces toothache pain by as much as 50 percent more.
  • Tickle in your Throat? – Play with your ears or clean out that ear wax. When the nerves in the ear are stimulated, it creates a reflex action in the throat. This can cause a muscle spasm that relieves the tickle.
  • Burned your Hand? – If you singe the skin on your hand, clean the skin and apply light pressure with the finger pads of the other hand. Ice will relieve your pain more quickly, but this method might prevent blistering because it brings the burned skin back to a normal temperature.
  • Can’t Hear That? – Lean in with the correct ear. Your left ear is better at picking up music. Lean in with the right ear to hear that mumbler friend of yours – it’s better at following the rapid rhythms of speech.
  • Gotta Go? Fantasize. Thinking about sex preoccupies your brain, so you won’t feel as much discomfort if you’ve gotta pee. For various reasons, this probably works better for men. Women can also vigorously scratch or rub the back of your leg for a few moments – you may interrupt the message from your bladder to your brain just long enough for you to make it to the toilet. Well, it’s better than the old grab-your-crotch method.
  • Heart Racing Jitters?– Blow on your thumb. The vagus nerve, which governs heart rate, can be controlled through breathing. It’s a variation of “stop and take three slow, deep breaths.”
  • Relief for sudden pain – Coughing during an injection can lessen the pain of the needle stick. It causes a sudden, temporary rise in pressure in the chest and spinal canal, inhibiting the pain-conducting structures of the spinal cord. Um, don’t try this at the dentist.
  • Dinner Repeating? – Sleep on your left side and you’ll be less likely to suffer from acid reflux. The esophagus and stomach connect at an angle. When you sleep on your right, the stomach is higher than the esophagus, allowing food and stomach acid to slide up your throat. When you’re on your left, the stomach is lower than the esophagus, so gravity works for you.
  • Dizzy? – If you had a bit too much to drink, put your hand on something stable. The cupula (the part of your ear responsible for balance) floats in a fluid of the same density as blood, but rises as alcohol dilutes blood. Give your brain a second opinion on where to find grounding, using the sensitive nerve endings of your fingers. You’ll feel more in balance this way than by putting your foot on the floor.
  • Stitch in your side? – Exhale as your left foot hits the ground. Most runners exhale as the right foot hits the ground, which puts downward pressure on the liver. This tugs at the diaphragm, causing a stitch. I guess you’re out of luck if you get stitches on the left side.
  • Nose bleed? – Put some cotton on your upper gums — just behind that small dent below your nose — and press against it, hard. If your nose bleed comes, like most, from the front of the septum (the cartilage wall that divides the nose), this will work.
  • Ice Cream Headache? – Press your tongue flat against the roof of your mouth, covering as much as you can. The more pressure you use, the faster that headache will go away. Because your mouth is cold, your brain thinks that your body is freezing. It compensates by overheating – causing the ice-cream headache.
  • Tingly Hands? – Rock your head from side to side. In less than a minute, the pins and needles will be gone. Loosening your neck muscles relieves compression in the bundle of nerves in your neck. If your feet or legs are tingling, you’ll just have to get up and walk around.
  • Strengthen Your Vision – Every few hours during the day, close your eyes, tense your body, take a deep breath, and, after a few seconds, release your breath and muscles at the same time. Tightening and releasing major muscle groups can trick involuntary muscles – like the eyes – into relaxing as well. It’s good for stress too. Try a long body stretch with your eyes closed. You can also help prevent eye strain by exercising your eyes – if you stare at a computer screen all day, make sure to focus on something far away every so often. Play with depth of field.
  • Know When to Fold ’em – Have someone hold one arm straight out to the side, palm down, and instruct him to maintain this position. Then place two fingers on his wrist and push down. He’ll resist. Now have him put one foot on a surface that’s a half inch higher (a few magazines) and repeat. This time his arm will cave. By misaligning his hips, you’ve offset his spine. Your brain senses that the spine is vulnerable, so it shuts down the body’s ability to resist. Now, how to get a burgler to put one foot on some magazines…
  • Just Got to Remember This – Giving a speech? Going to an interview? Meeting the complicated in-laws? Review what you need to remember before you go to sleep. Anything you read right before bed is more likely to be encoded as long-term memory. Right, so I’ve got thousands of novels burned into my brain. I have always read non-fiction in the daytime and fiction at night – guess I should have done the other way around. People given a mathematical problem before they went to bed had higher chances of solving it the next morning, too. Experiment to see if the morning brings your solutions to you. Think carefully about the problem before going to sleep, then let it go – and let your brain work on it while you get some rest.
  • Need a creative solution? Free your mind. Get out of the box – in all ways. Maybe you should take a little walk to the church on the corner. People tend to think more freely and abstractly in rooms with higher ceilings, and tend toward more detail-oriented specifics in more confined rooms with lower ceilings. So if you’re in a high-ceiling loft trying to do some accounting, you might want to cocoon? I’m going to refrain from further comment on this today (ex-JWs take note), except just to invoke the word “mountains.”
  • Mood Hack – Let your thoughts and emotions be whatever they are, but play with the focus of your attention. You ignore almost all sensations and perceptions most of the time. Give your little toes the gift of your attention for a moment – wiggle them. Move your focus through your body, and especially notice your breathing. When you focus on it, your breathing automatically slows down and you breathe more deeply. Spend a few minutes moving your focus around through your toes and up to your head. Scrunch up your face. Smile. Stretch. Focus on the sensations you feel. Then focus on different aspects of and objects in your immediate environment. Try it. You’ll like it.

From Men’s Health and LifeHacker. The last one is mine, from lots of sources that I couldn’t possibly trace today.